Tips for Dealing with Resistant And Less-Than-Eager Students

As my teaching career and interest in serving others through yoga has progressed, I've found myself teaching a different group of students. These teaching situations are unlike those at the yoga studios, clubs, and resorts I teach at where my students are eager and excited to be in class.

I've taught adults with drug and alcohol addiction where yoga is a part of the recovery program. I've taught 12 - 16 year old girls in a delinquency prevention program. I've taught football players preparing for the NFL draft. I've taught my husband - who I must admit has been dragged to class by me a couple times! Within these classes I am often met with resistance from the students: they don't want to be there, they think yoga is silly, they won't stop talking to their neighbor or show respect for me and the other students. They scowl at me and come out of the pose after trying it for one breath... It can be very frustrating to me and disruptive to the students who DO want to be there.

So how does a teacher deal? How can a teacher help each and every student find the benefits of yoga and embrace their practice. Here are a few tips that have helped me:

1. Don't take it personally. If a student is not into the practice, it does not mean you are a bad teacher. Stay out of your head and continue to teach with confidence. You don't need to get the person to like you. Instead, show a little tough love, which leads into my next tip...

2. Hold each student accountable. When you say "bend your front knee deeper" in Warrior II and the student doesn't budge, make eye contact, gesture or demonstrate the knee bend, and don't move your eye contact away from the student until he responds. If the eye contact doesn't work, walk right over to the student and guide his knee into place.

3. Speak to what is coming up. If students aren't taking the class seriously and are joking around, speak to the seriousness of taking care of their body. Speak to the choice that they made to be here. Yes, maybe Coach sent you, you signed up for this recovery program but did not know it included yoga, or even your wife dragged you here. But in all truth, you made the choice to be a part of the team, a part of the program, or to give in to your wife. So now you can embrace your choice, move forward, and be open to the possibilities your practice (the decision you made) can offer you. Or you can choose to fight it the whole way through, and never get this hour of your life back. Bring them into a Warrior II hold or Half Pigeon and speak to letting go of resistance and what is then possible in the pose - as well as in your life - once you experience that letting go.

4. Set ground rules or guidelines. If I am working with a new group, especially one that has never done yoga, I find it helps to set some ground rules at the very beginning, that should be reviewed each class. Just like kids need structure in the classroom, new yoga students need structure for their class. Here are the ground rules I often use:
   1) Everyone practices. Even if you have an injury, are tired, can't do tree pose - whatever the excuse might be - I ask all my students to practice. Yoga is accessible to anyone, and I will gladly offer modifications for injuries and circumstances. I explain that they don't need to make it "perfect" or get a pose "right." I just ask that they try. Often they will be surprised what they can do once they let their excuses be gone.
   2) Respect - for the teacher and for their fellow students. That means do not have side conversations. You can laugh, sigh, grunt, but do not be disruptive to your fellow students who are trying to enjoy themselves and get the most from their yoga experience. Respect me as a teacher by giving me your attention and following my ground rules/guidelines.
 
5. Connect - through your heart and your touch. Physical assists can start to break down the barrier between student and teacher. If your intention while assisting is to support and help, a student will feel that when you touch them. Don't go overboard or get creepy, but don't be afraid to get in their and help the student connect to her asana and her body. Also create a heart connection. Allow your students to see you for who you really are. Drop the yoga teacher script and be real. They will appreciate that and want to give you more of a real effort from themselves.

6. Keep it light. Yoga can be fun - even when working through tough poses and serious issues (like resistance). You need to step in with tough love at times, but balance that with a light-heartedness and playful approach. Remember to smile.... BIG!

I find that students with resistance start to warm to yoga the more they practice it. It's like during each session a layer is peeled away. Stay committed to your intention and you will make a difference in all your students' lives.

Gratitude, Space, And Following My Heart

One thing yoga has taught me is gratitude. When I am in a state of gratitude, I notice more magic and joy appearing in my life. Whether it's the sunshine on my face, the peaceful view from my backyard, or the look of love I get from my dog, I can't help but be thankful for these small miracles that are part of my everyday life.

Today, I am feeling overwhelmed in gratitude for where my life has brought me. What a different place I am in now than I was over a year ago. A year ago at this time I was starting the dreaded countdown to the end of the weekend in anticipation of Monday morning. I knee what my heart was calling me to do, but wasn't yet ready to dive fully in. Back then I felt like I was in the wrong place; but really, I was right where I was supposed to be, following all the steps that were already being planned for me leading me to where I am right now.

With so much gratitude for where I am right now, I look back - also with gratitude - to where I have been. I realize that each part of my path was special. Each part taught me something different. And each part lead me to right here. The key, I think, was being present enough in my life - and inside myself - to listen to the wisdom within me, to follow my heart. I have found that the more I follow my heart, the more loudly my heart speaks to me. I don't have anxiety anymore over decisions I have to make. If I am not sure in which direction to move forward, I give the question some space (meaning I let it go and stop fretting, analyzing, and thinking about it), make sure I hit my meditation cushion morning and night, and allow the answer to come to me. It always does, and I can feel in my body that I am making the right decision, following the right path. It really is as simple as that.

Back To Business

Why hellooooo blog! I have missed you. Life has kept me busy over the past two months as I have been wrapping up a freelance project for the previous industry I worked in, conference production. I committed to the project back in August thinking it would be a good way to ease into my full time yoga and writing career. And it was, but I am glad that it's almost compete. "Where your focus goes, energy flows," says Baron Baptiste. And I am ready for my energy to flow - even more! - into my yoga teaching and writing.

That is actually a huge lesson I have learned this fall. What you intend for yourself, you create. What you can envision in your mind is possible in your life. Where you focus your thoughts, energy, and time, you get results. That could be a job, relationship, yoga pose (hello first time crows or headstand!), anything - even negative things like bad habits or anxious thoughts. Yoga shows me more and more that the life I am living is a gift. Each breath I breathe is a gift. Each day I get to wake up, is a true miracle! So why should I spend my gift of life doing things that drag me down, deplete my energy, and don't serve the world? I believe when you find your passion, you have to follow it. I am so glad I found the courage to do so.

Every day when I wake up I thank God for my life. For the fact that I get to spend my day doing what I love and getting paid for it. That I live in a beautiful city with lots of sunshine and sunsets that can bring tears of joy to my eyes. That everything works itself out. Yes, faith is a true blessing if you can let go and trust that you are being taken care of by the universe. I know life will not always be pumpkin pie (yum!) but what an amazing ride this is. Hop on and ENJOY!!!!

Simplicity, Eliminate Clutter, Be Real To Find Your Style

Writing is very yogic. I am reading William Zinsser's "On Writing Well" (that I'm pretty sure I read in college but want a refresher), and many of his principals of writing are similar to principals of teaching yoga.

One of Zinsser's first principals is simplicity. He says that writers need to be clearheaded and say what they want to say the simplest way. As a yoga teacher, I need to be clearheaded when I teach class. In fact, one of the most important parts of teaching yoga for me is taking a few moments before class starts to get grounded or present, so I can teach class from a clear space. To be simple in writing and in teaching yoga, we need to be clear about what our objective is. If the reader or student is confused and finds it hard to follow the writing or class, they often won't come back for more.

Another key principal Zinsser discusses is eliminating clutter from writing, which ties into simplicity. Do we really need to say, "a personal friend"? Can't we just say "a friend"? I also love his example that we don't need to say, "At the present time we are experiencing precipitation." We can simply say, "It is raining." If I give my students every single alignment cue for a pose, will they get the pose any better? They are probably more likely to tune me out completely. Where can I eliminate unnecessary words to allow students to have space for their practice and presence, instead of my voice constantly in their head? If I have a class of experienced yogis, instead of saying, "step your right foot forward into warrier one pose," can't I just say, "right foot, warrier one"?

Zinsser goes on to talk about style. Many writers are afraid that once they simplify what they are saying and eliminate clutter, it results in no unique writing style. But Zinsser argues differently. He says this is real and raw, and that is the kind of writer readers want to keep reading. I am constantly working on be "real" in my classes. You'd think being real shouldn't be so hard, but throughout life, humans are told how to behave, what to say, what others think. How often are we really "real" instead of acting how we think others want us to act?

I love these three ideas for both writing and teaching yoga: simplicity, eliminate clutter, be real to find your style. In fact, they are great principals for living your life!

Our Thoughts Are Powerful; Align Them With The Life You Want

Our words are very powerful. I notice that since I have been trying to live a life more in line with things I love, I have a lot of thoughts in my head like:

• I want to bake more and be creative in the kitchen.
• I wish I were a morning person.
• I really want to spend more time being artistic and creative - more writing, crafts, art perhaps.

If you look closely at my words, you'll notice that I am making true exactly what I am saying. Because my thoughts are so powerful, I find myself still wanting to bake more, wishing I were a morning person, and wanting to be more artistic. 

Two of my favorite writers, Neale Donald Walsch and Wayne Dyer, discuss this idea of the power of our words. They have similar ideas that if we want to change something about our life, we have to change our thinking. Therefore, my statements above should become:

• I'm baking more.
• I am a morning person.
• I spend more time being artistic and creative. 

If I don't change my thoughts, I will stay in a state of wanting and wishing, creating exactly what I am saying in my head. But that's not what I want out of my short life here on this earth!!

So I changed my thinking, and I am starting small. Every time I think I should really bake more, I look up a recipe and decide to make something! What has held me back in this area is that I am an all or nothing person. I am either an awesome baker who bakes all the time, or not a baker at all. But that is not how life has to be. I can bake once a week or once a month, and if that makes me happy, then awesome!!

I get these ideas in my head that change has to be drastic and shocking, that I have to rearrange my life to do something new or be a certain new way. But change can happen at each moment. Change is small, and in fact, even things that appear to be BIG changes happened from the succession of many small changes. 

Would it make me happy to bake and write today? YES! Does it have to be perfect? No! All that matters is that I do what makes my heart sing, and then the singing gets louder and louder and louder...

Happy baking!

Quit Trying, Just Be Yourself

Last month I participated in Level 1 Journey Into Power Teacher Training with Baron Baptiste. I went to the weeklong boot camp to strengthen my teaching and assisting skills and to find out if my friends who had already participated in Baron’s bootcamps were right when they told me Level 1 would change my life. One of the 130 participants of the training summed it up well when she said, “I came here to learn how to be a better teacher; but instead, I am learning how to be a better me!”

For me, Level 1 was about being seen through the eyes of others. Through other’s open and honest feedback to me I learned many things, in particular that I was trying too hard in my teaching. “Quit trying, Sara,” one of my teammates said to me, “and just be yourself.”

Just be. That’s a lot easier said than done. But as I sat with those words, I saw that “trying” rather than “being” came up a lot in my life. I was always trying to accomplish something, trying to meet what I thought were other’s expectations of me, trying to practice my yoga better.  Why couldn’t I just be?

During Level 1 Baron encouraged us to give up what we must in order to show up in our lives and as yoga teachers as powerful and authentic. What was holding me back? As the week’s practices and exercises began to digest in my heart and mind, I learned that what I needed to give up were judgment and expectation.

The first morning class, for example, was very difficult for me. It was long, physically challenging, and hot. As I struggled through class my mind kicked in full speed, as it often does: “How come you are so tired, Sara? Why isn’t your practice as strong as it normally is? You should be trying harder. This pose should be cake for you. You are better than this…” And on and on. I was clearly judging myself and comparing my practice to past experiences instead of practicing with what was currently real for me. And because my mind got the best of me, I fought myself, my head, through most of the four-hour asana practice. Needless to say, it didn’t make the practice any easier.

Through others’ sharing at Level 1, I learned that how we treat ourselves is often how we treat others. So if I was being judgmental of myself during practice and in my life, where was I being judgmental of others? I started becoming more present to the thoughts that race through my head when I am with other people; thoughts I hadn’t even realized were there before. In my head I was trying to figure others out when I was with them, and creating my own story about who they are and what I thought they were thinking. From this place I was then trying (there is that trying again!) to be who I thought they wanted me to be. With all this trying and judging, I miss out on just being with each person. When I drop the story in my head and allow myself to just be, I am able to see beauty in everyone. I am able to be real with them. I also notice that when I stop judging myself and let go of expectations, I see the beauty and power within me.

Through the other yogis at Level 1, I uncovered strengths that I never realized I possess.  My teaching team, for example, highlighted integrity, equanimity, and commitment to growth as three of my strongest traits. By being present and being real with me, my team was able to empower me, and in turn, I was able to empower them.

What Was Level 1 Teacher Training & Who Have You Been?

Towards the end of Journey Into Power Level 1 Teacher Training, Baron asked us to write two letters in our journal. The first letter is to someone who is not familiar with yoga to describe what the experience was about. The second letter is from myself five years in the future as I would write a letter to someone I was mentoring to tell them who I had been to get to where I was. Both are below...

#1 What Was Level One Teacher Training?

Dear You :)

Level 1 Teacher Training was about connecting to my true self. I learned about my way of being and thinking and how it limits my connection to people. I learned to look others in the eye, to drop judgement, and to see each and every person's beauty. I investigated areas of my life that seemed stuck and weren't making me happy to determine how I can change to allow for difference outcomes. I learned curiousity that will allow me to continually examine my life to see where I am holding back and being inauthentic. I danced! I found my voice! I strengthened my yoga practice, and I empowered my self!

Love, Sara

#2 Who Have You Been?

Dear Mentee, 

Over the last five years I maintained my meditation practice to stay connected to my inner self. I pursued my dreams rather than just dreaming them. I put them into action step by step. I stayed open - and said YES! - to opportunities in my life, and especially I continued to check in with myself to be sure I was truly being open and real with other people. I was a student of each person that crossed my path and each experience I had. I faced challenges, but I stayed connected to my heart and my inspiration to guide me along the path. I trusted my gut. I believed that no idea was too big or unachievable. I took baby steps and kept on going. I surrounded myself with people who supported me and kept me in check. I chose projects that excited me and I learned that there are so many ways to serve others. I asked for help and supported my team. I saw the beauty of each person that crossed my path. 

Love, 

Sara of 2016 :)